A new me...

So. It's July. The end of July. Remember all those great plans I had to get in shape. Well, I'm about seven months behind, but I started. I started working on it Saturday. I have a friend that is a personal trainer. I had approached her earlier in the year (like January) and asked for assistance in her services. She just told me to call when I was ready. Well, at about noon on Friday I decided I was ready. I'm not sure why. I was in the car. I was driving to CVS to pick up pictures and it hit me like a ton of bricks. So, I called her. She called me back Friday night and said, "Meet me at the gym at 8:30 in the morning." Just to clarify...Saturday morning...8:30. Whew. Okay. I went. She took me through two days worth of stuff in an hour. And today people...I want to die. My arms hurt. My back hurts. My boobs hurt. It hurts. Maybe being out of shape isn't that bad? No just kidding!! I don't know that I can put into words what I wish to accomplish by this body transformation. It's not like I think getting in shape is going to make me the happiest person in the world. But, I think that maybe it will make me like myself a little bit more. I hate when I look in the mirror. I hate it! ICK! I always say, I used to be thin. Well, honestly, I have been overweight now for much longer than I was thin. AND it's not all about being thin to me. I just don't want to be "uncomfortable" in my body. If being comfortable is an 8. I'm good with that. I'm just not much loving the 12's right now. The 10's? I'm okay. But the 12's suck! I'm so self conscious. I really, truly don't think that anyone looks at me and thinks...OMG what a pig. But, I'm not loving pictures of me from vacation. So, on the path I go. I can do this! I can work 30 to 45 minutes 5 days a week on me. It will be okay. I also drank more water yesterday than I have in forever and not because I didn't have anything else to drink...I was thirsty for water. I'm not going to try to "diet" right now. I don't really eat that bad anyway. I'm just going to concentrate on working out and then I'll work on my eating habits...which tend to be that I don't eat enough so my body hangs on to everything it gets. Like, right now...Sunday after church. I have had, um a cup of coffee from Starbucks and one chocolate donut. Lovely. 1:03 p.m. My body is in shock from lack of food, but I just haven't stopped to eat yet. Kids have eaten. They're in bed. But, I do need to make a sandwhich or something. So, tomorrow I get "measured." That should be gross. But, I'm excited. She says that if I do what she tells me to do weights and cardio wise that she can have me in shape by Thanksgiving!! How awesome would that be? Except that I just freaking caved and bought new clothes for vacation, but I'll take that! I'll buy new ones!! I'll keep you updated!!